A friend suggested maybe I was burned out–hence the lack of productivity (in my opinion, anyway). I did begin drafting an article about my book tour, which I hope to sell to an industry magazine. But overall, my enthusiasm and energy have dwindled, and perhaps it is time to regroup and refocus. I am reading more now, which makes me happy. I am also sewing my son some winter slippers. Sewing, reading–those things make me happy. Perhaps I will take a small break from the pressure of promotion. My son is also sick, which means less time at the computer, more time with him. I hope he gets better in time for Christmas!
I did call a couple of bookstores in Oakland where I’d left copies of my book on consignment (back in October when I’d done my reading there). The first place I called still had the original two copies. Boo. The other place was apparently “too busy to deal with consignments right now.” I resented that attitude, that my book is somewhat not worthy enough (and thus me either) that I had to be treated with rudeness. Consignments smell like self-publishing, but why does that instantly draw ire? That experience has made me sour, but I will move past it.
I received generic rejections from Gulf Stream, elimae. Every Day Fiction rejected me also, but it was personalized. I’m not sure I agreed with some of the feedback. One editor said that there wasn’t enough conflict. How much conflict can you really fit into a 500 word story? I mean, don’t get me wrong, there was conflict, but it wasn’t over the top. I think it’s one of those things that have to do with taste. But I do appreciate how they really take the time to reject you properly. At least I know they read my story! I also received a very personal email rejection from Bateau Press. My story appears to have made it close, but did not get selected.
I think over Christmas, I am going to focus on doing some pleasure reading (what?!) and pursue other creative interests away from promoting. I will write when I feel like it, but I won’t force it upon myself nor will I make myself feel guilty if I don’t do a damn thing all day. No more negative self-talk!